9rules Changes Corporate Infrastructure, Aligns With Universe

Last week we launched Ali and that wasn’t the only change that happened within 9rules. There have also been some structural changes that we would like to announce. Since all the cool and professional people are doing press releases we thought it would be best to announce these changes in a Press Release that can be read below.

9rules Changes Corporate Infrastructure

9rules has taken a deep look at its corporate infrastructure and decided that a revamp was needed to boost morale and the bottomline.

Tampa, FL, February 12, 2007 — 9rules,, the Quality Loves Company company, today announced a major restructuring of their board of directors today, and the department for redundancy department.

Community Director Tyme White has moved into the new position of Queen of the Universe. While having very little experience at being Queen of anything, White feels she can improve upon the way the Universe works and hopefully guide 9rules to new places.

“I’m excited about working with both 9rules and the Universe because we believe that without the Universe, there would be no 9rules,” said Tyme White, former Community Director. “The ability to meld the secrets of the Universe with 9rules instantly adds millions of potential new thingies to our Community, which benefits our Members and my.9r Users alike. Add to that what Advertiser wouldn’t love to put their name in front of an infinite number of space particles?”

Scrivs, the uber formerly known as Paul Scrivens, will not retain his figurehead position as CEO of the company and will be taking on a new position of upside down.

“We contemplated many types of exotic woods for our board — cedar, maple, pine — but in the end we had to go back to our roots,” said former CEO/President/Co-Founder/Video Superstar Mr. Paul Scrivens. “Looking back I am surprised that we didn’t make this move earlier since the partnership seems so obvious.”

Mike Rundle, formerly the Chief Design Officer, was demoted due to his inability to ensure the perfection of IE’s rendering of 9rules. Mike Rundle could not be reached for comment. Sources close to Mr. Rundle say that his marathon run of IE7 bug fixes have put him into a perpetual near-death experience involving Bill Gates and a monkey. His new position has yet to be decided and the company is still unsure if he will be allowed any interaction with the Universe.

Unlike existing businesses, the Universe has been dominating its field for billions of years. Whispers of a monopoly breakup were being heard around 2000 B.C., but they quickly disappeared and the Universe has been providing millions of stars for onlookers ever since.

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Upside, Down

The Universe / Media Contact
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